Thoughts, feelings, initial reactions to the progression meeting

I was given 4 more weeks of clinical/ 160 hours for calling in on Friday September 13. I was shocked and could not believe what I was hearing as Chris told me what the progressions committee decided.

- I have a 4.0, perfect clinical clinical track record so why this?
- I feel this is not me, this is not who I am. I am a team player, hard working, not trying to find the easy way out. I feel like I do not deserve this heavy of  a punishment
- Chris told me there has been an increasing number of incidents where students call in last minute (unknown to me). So he told me they are drawing the line, putting their foot down and showing that this behavior will not be tolerated. So in essence I am being made an example. A similar incident happened with one of my classmates 6 months ago when he called out for a bachelors party. But no progressions meeting for him, he met with Chris, and he was not punished like I am. Its tough because it feels unfair. One incident, one time.
- A hard aspect of this for me is what others will think of me when they here about my punishment. Its easy to think "Oh that guy must be a problem maker/bad student. I'm sure he deserves what he got." I feel like this mars my character, mars the perception others have of me. It is helping me appreciate how Jesus must have felt "This is not who I am." In John 1 it says the world did not recognize him. We did not recognize Jesus throughout his life and especially at his death. We severely misunderstood him. This experience is helping me realize a little bit more of how Jesus must have felt. And those feelings can lead you two ways resentment and anger or rising above. I see in my classmates many who are enbittered towards the school, resentful, hateful. I have always let some of these frustrating issues with the school slide off my back. Now I see where some of my classmates are coming from. It would be so easy to resent and hate the school. It would feel good to slander the school for "what they did to me." Yes... that would be easy. It would feel good for a while. Or I can choose to rise above the cards I have been dealt and grow. I see that I have a wonderful opportunity to grow in my relationship with God. Before this incident. I had a plan. Senior elective 4 days a week, study for boards, graduate, take the exam, and slide right through these last couple months, easy...  breezy. Now things have changed, my "plan" has changed and will not work. An opportunity to trust. Proverbs 3:5-6. I was relying on myself and what I could do. I no longer have that false "luxury."

Philippians 4:4

Philippians 4:13

Philippians 2:3

Romans 8:28